Cul-De-Sac Conquest

"I was a crazy kid; I was always making a scene. My dad had to talk the cops out of arresting me a few times, maybe one time to many. He kicked me out of the house and told me how disappointed he was with me. It struck me like a lightning bolt to my heart. It made me change my ways - I grew up.

I got out of my disrespectful and childish ways and realized that I was quite foolish for doing the things I have done. Now, as the neighborhood kids act out the very shananigans I did when I was younger, I must take action. I must make sure that they learn so they too can become productive members of society, maybe they can even become accountants, lawyers or doctors. I definitely don't want them to end up like my friends did - constantly in and out of jail, leading lives in quiet desperation."

"At one point in time Robert was just a normal guy. He was charming, handsome, and some might even say charismatic - no one would say that now. Why just today Robert decided to release his rage on the neighborhood children by lecturing them with a long-winded story. He is the absolute worst.

Some may say I am not much better, though, I STRONGLY disagree. I am not as bad as Mr. Robert T. Rage. That man is an absolute mess. He is an abomination to this Cul-De-Sac and I want him gone NOW!"

"I am not quite sure why I moved here - it was many a moon ago. However, I surely cannot move out. I have far too much stuff to move, and besides I cannot see my dreadfully annoying neighbors win. I will not allow it. If they want to play games than I will play games. If they want to compete to annoy me out of my own home I will make sure that I will NOT go out quietly."

"Jim and I decided to move here because we thought it would be a safe place to raise Tommy. Though, the more we look the more we find wrong with the neighborhood. We are living in a death trap. Poor Tommy. We only want the best for him. We want him to live a happy life, but everyone insists on making that difficult for us.

The other day Tommy ventured into that nasty hoarder’s backyard and explored his filth. Tommy climbed up a washing machine to get a better look and fell down on his head. He had a massive gash in his forehead. We will never let him leave the house without a helmet again… The world is just too crazy. We cannot take it any more. We have to get this hoarder out of our Cul-De-Sac. If it were not for our atrocious neighbors this would have been the ideal location for us. It is right by the nice schools, clean parks and Jim’s job."

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